Cocoshack

[Ub3rD4n]

Yaaay, comments! I'm so vain. Also, yay, three updates in as many days! You can probably thank the university trimester slowing to a close for that one. so, we continue our epic tale:

Chapter Five: The Eye of the Crackers

"Aaaand welcome, ladies and gents, to the 43rd annual Silaceous Open! The sky is a beutiful blue today, and we can expect eighteen holes of top-notch golf! I'm Gabby O'Fry, with the pre-game commentary!"

It was a beautiful day for golf. Many hopefuls were lined up for the chance to win the five thousand for first prize, including Coco and Bloo. Mr Herriman was attending to Coco, and giving her some "advice". "Hm, stiff competition this year, but we shall not be outdone! Miss Coco, it is time to take your "vitamins"." said Mr Herriman, holding out a stick of gum. "Coco......" said Coco, unsure.
"You want to win, do you not? Think of Madame Foster! Think of the trophy! The respect! Think of the vegemite-covered bannanas!"
Coco hesitated for a moment, then swallowed the gum. "Co....co."
"Yes, very good."
At thatmoment, Frankie walked up to Mr Herriman and Coco. "Good luck, Coco! We'll all be cheering for you!" she said.
"Co.....co."
"Are you okay, Coco? You don't look so good."
"She's perfectly fine! Just a little nervous about the game!"
"But-"
"Now, off you go, Miss Francies, and reserve yourself some good seats! Ta-ta!"
Frankie hesitantly obeyed, walking off into the crowd of spectators setting up. Mr Herriman let out a "Whew!" and wiped his brow.

"Hey, Bloo! They've got a stand giving out free subway sandwiches to anyone competing!" claimed Mac, coming up to Bloo, who was prepping "his" golf clubs. "Yeah, I wouldn't touch 'em if I were you." he replied. Another competitor who was nearby suddenly grabbed his stomach and ran off to the nearest porta-loo.
"Bloo! Did you put laxative in the free subs?"
"Mac! I'm surprised and shocked that you'd think such a thing! Actually I put in some funky meat that I found lying under Coco's nest."
"Uugh! Bloo, that is nasty!"
"Just taking care of a little of the competition, Mac. Since I suck at golf, I'm gonna have to. Speaking of which...."

"I say! Heriman, old boy! Fancy meeting you here!" Groomington, the man from the golf course, was approaching Mr Herriman and Coco. "Not thinking of entering this year, are you?"
"As a matter of fact, my protige, Coco, shall be entering the tournament."
"That thing? Herriman, you can't be serious! And who's going to be her caddy, a dog?"
"No, that'd be me." said Wilt.
"I is auxillary caddy!" stated Eduardo.
"And I'm just a pain!" added Slugger.
"Mm, well, good luck, Herriman. Can't wait to see your "golfer" out on the field! Ta!" and with that, Groomington left, leaving Mr Herriman feeling thoughroughly embarrassed. "Hey, Coco," said Bloo, approaching from over the field, " Wanna submarine sandwich?"
"Miss Coco is on a strict diet, no sandwiches. Now, if you'll excuse us, we must make ready for the tee-off." said Mr Herriman, and with that, they left.

It was the tee-off. Groomington was already strutting back from having hit two under par (for you non-golfers, that's good.). "Now, Miss Coco, just as we practised." Mr Herriman whispered. He then rotated Coco into the right direction.
"Master Wilt, the driver."
"Here you go."
"This isn't the driver! It's the four iron! Pass me the DRIVER please!"
Wilt sheepishly gave Mr Herriman the right club this time, and backed away. Mr Herriman then gave Coco the club and told her to hit it. And did she! It got a hole in one! The crowd surrounding the field, largely interspersed with imaginary friends who had come along to cheer Coco on, went wild.

"And that was Coco, an imaginary friend, who seems to have some astounding talent in the game of golf! Chances are looking good for her winning this tournament, especially as an outbreak of food poisoning has incapacitated all but four contestants! Chad Groomington, four-time champion of this tournament, Coco, Bloo, another imaginary friend, and a man by the name of....Mr Applebee."

Mr Herriman hopped off the field, towing Coco along behind, as Bloo and Mac approached the tee. "Club." said Bloo, putting his hand out towards Mac. Mac gave him a driver. Bloo grabbed it and stared at the ball, concentrating. Bowling Paul made his way to the front of the crowd and shouted "Just remember what I taught you!". Eduardo shouted "You can DO it!". Bloo closed his eyes and began muttering "Go to your happy place, Bloo. Go to your happy place....."

Fade in on Bloo's happy place. a place lined with trees which are actually giant, self-paddling paddleballs. Bloo goes by to see Cheese riding Eduardo like a horsey. He sees Wilt and Frankie playing under a sprinkler. He walks up to a luxurious two-person chair with Mac in it, jumps on, puts his feet up on Terrence's stuffed carcass, and watches some TV with his best friend while Mac's mom serves him a huge bowl of chocolate pudding.

Fade back to reality. Bloo swings the club. Things go in slo-mo. He hits the ball! The ball goes bounding off a tree, into the crowd, and hits Crackers.
"Ow! My eye! I'm not supposed to get golf balls in it!"

Bowling Paul then tried to subtlely blend into the crowd, and pretend he doesn't know Bloo at all.

[antgirl1]

LOLOLOL at Bloo's happy place! XDD

[Ub3rD4n]

Wow. I'm having a real glut of no-work lately. Which is good! Well, maybe not for you guys, 'cause it means I get to work more on my fanfic! Speaking of which, our last chapter in the Cocoshack fic! Here we go!

Chapter 6: Hole in None

"And that was yet another poor performance by Blooreguard Kazoo, who is trailing behind in this tournament. Unless the other competitors fail to complete the course, he has no chance of winning. Next up on the last hole, Mr Applebee.."

"Give it up, Bloo. You lost." said Mac, somberly. "No! It's not over yet!" said Bloo, coming back from the tee, "I can still win! I got one trick from a movie that's bound to work out well!" he then ran off into the crowd.

"Let us pray that Mr Applebee flubs this shot." said Mr Herriman, who was watching from the crowd, with Coco, who was still unresponsive, due to the gum. "If not, we may have some competition for first place."

Mr Applebee walked up to the tee, waved to his family in the crowd, and made ready to make the shot. At that moment, a golf cart came zooming out onto the field, piloted by Slugger, and pursued by security. It ran Mr Applebee straight over! "Woohoo! How you like me now?!" Slugger shouted.

"And some maniac has driven a golf cart out onto the field and injured Mr Applebee! It's a two-horse race now, folks. Chad Groomington and Coco are the only ones with a chance to win!"

"Ha! What a stroke of luck! Groomington did poorly on that last shot, so we practically have this in the bag!" Mr Herriman cheered. He and Coco approached the tee, followed by Wilt, carrying the clubs. "Driver, Master Wilt." Mr Herriman demanded. Wilt handed him a club. "I said driver, Master Wilt! It was a simple instruction! Why, of all the ignorance-"
"I'm sorry, but that is IT!" Wilt interrupted. "You've been nothing but abusive to me since I took up this job! Well, I'm sorry, but you'll have to find yourself another caddy! I quit!" and with that, he stormed off into the crowd. "That can be arranged." Mr Herrimand said, matter-of-factly. "Master Eduardo! You are now full caddy!"
"Yay! Yay! I is caddy!" Eduardo cheered, jumping up and down.
"Oh, wait a minute. This WAS the driver. Silly me." Mr Herriman muttered.

"Hey, Wilt," Bloo called, as Wilt and he were walking through the crowd, "You know that alligator that got your hand?"
"I'm sorry Bloo, but I didn't lose this hand to an alligator. I lost it in a basketball accident."
"Oh. Then never mind." said Bloo, nervously.
ROAR! A cry sounded over the golf course, and an alligator came charging into the crowd. Everyone scattered out of it's path. Everyone, that is, except Coco. Until she got spear-tackled by Mr Herriman. "Coco! You're in danger! You have to run!" he said, trying in vain to drag her out of the way. "Co...co..." Coco responded. "Its that blasted gum! I shall have to perform the heimlich!" Mr Herriman announced, and made to do just that, as the alligator slowly bore down on them. "Spit it out! Spit out the blasted gum, woman!" shouted Mr Herriman, as his heimliching caused Coco to spit out a number of things: a squeaky toy, a teddy bear, some glow-in-the-dark vampire teeth, and finally, a wad of gum!

"Coco!" Coco cried, shaking her lethargy instantly. The Alligator charged. Coco layed an egg. The alligator snapped its jaws, and the egg popped open to reveal.... a wind up toy duck. "Quack!.....Quack!" it called, as it waddled aimlessly across the field. The alligator snapped it up, and it exploded! This was enough to make the alligator run off, leaving the golf course entirely. The crowd slowly came out of hiding and then cheered.

"What a turn of events, folks! An alligator somehow got onto the field, and a heroic imaginary friend saved the life of another! And also, the maniac who crashed the golf cart has been arrested! What a day for golf! And here comes the final shot of the match! Coco has practically got this one in the bag!"

Coco approached the tee once more. Mr Herriman tipped his hat to her. "The shot is all yours." he said. Eduardo handed her the club. Coco spun around crying "Cococococo!" and hit the ball! Everyone watched as it soared through the air, and landed straight in the hole! "A hole in one! I can't believe it! We won!" Mr Herriman exclaimed.
"Or, you would have, if that was the right hole." added Mac.
"Yes, thank you master Mac, for ruining that moment thoughroughly."

"Ooh, bad luck for Coco, being WAY off her target. That means that she cannot complete the course and the Silaceous Open goes once again to Chad Groomington!"

"Haha! That means I win!" crowed Groomignton, approaching Mr Herriman and Coco. Coco looked rather sad at losing. "But of course, you never really stood a chance. I mean you are only imaginary, after all. Quite pathetic really. I mean, what were you thinking-" SLAP! "You, sir, are a cad!" said Mr Herriman, angrily, putting back on his left glove. "You have no right to critisise this fine lady, or look down on her simply because she is imaginary. It is ungentlemanly. For shame." He then turned to Coco, Wilt and Eduardo. "And I should be ashamed also. I acted boorishly to all of you, and I apologise. Is there any way, that I can make it up to you?" He said, sheepishly.

"Well, I can think of ONE way..."said Wilt.

...........................


"And Coco steps up to bat. This girl's got a mean batting average, but she's never gone up against a pitcher like Blooreguard "The Blue Streak" Kazoo! Bases are loaded, bottom of the ninth, none out-"
"Bloo, just pitch the ball!" shouted Mac, who happened to be on one of those bases. Bloo wound up, pitched, and Coco hit it right out of the park, er, Fosters back yard. It went flying for blocks.
"Man, that's gonna take ages to return!" exclaimed Mac.
"No problem." said Wilt. "Oh, ball boy....."
Mr Herriman came hopping up, and out towards the direction of the ball. "Yes, sir Master Wilt! I'm on it!"

"It gonna take Senor Herriman forever to work off his debt at this rate. It take half an hour for each ball Coco hits." stated Eduardo. "Yeah, maybe we should let him off." said Wilt. "At the end of this game." And Wilt, Coco, Bloo, Eduardo and Mac all laughed.

The End.

Epilouge:

"Now, I know the ball landed on your property, but be reasonable! There's no need to snap at me! I'm simply asking if I can have it back!" Mr Herriman yelled. Zoom out to see that he's arguing with the alligator, which has the ball in it's mouth, and is growling. "Very well, I tried to be reasonable. I shall have to use force!"

............................................

Well, that's that story over. I quite liked it. Like the other, it turned out even better on paper than in my head. Or at least I thought so. What do you think? I'd appreciate all comments!

[jekylljuice]

Aww, poor Crackers. I hope he got compensation for all damage endured by his eye.

Anyhow, great job there, Dan. I'll be awaiting all further work from you very eagerly.

[antgirl1]

Again, awesome story. I'm gonna go read the next one now.

[KazooBloo]

Sweet read.