Not Larry Nice

[Ub3rD4n]

Well, I put it out there for opinions, and the first two were positive, and I've been hankerin' to get into this "fanfic" thing myself, so here we are. My first of what I hope to be many Fosters fanfics, "Not Larry Nice" (yeah, I still haven't worked out a better name than the working title, so that's it.)

Now, I have some semi-inflammatory opinions on Fosters fanfic, which I'll keep to myself, but I think that I'm just as bad as the worst fanfic writer if I'm just complaining (even if it IS just in my head) and not doing anything to improve the overall quality of Fosters fanfics, so I'm glad to finally be getting this done. Hopefully I'll live up to my own expectations and keep in the Fosters spirit. So, enough jabbin', time for the fic!

Chapter 1: In the way

It was an ordinary day at Fosters (ooh, BTW, look up Fosters Ordinary day on Youtube.Okay, back on topic). The sun was shining through the inordinately long windows, imaginary friends were wandering the halls at random, as they are wont to do in all those intro scenes. Good day.

In the kitchen, Jackie Khones was trying to reach a box of cereal in the pantry, but being rather vertically challenged, was having a difficult time of it. "Hey, Wilt," he asked of the very tall, red, imaginary friend walking past, "mind giving me a hand here?"

"Sure thing." Wilt replied with a smile, and reached his one arm up and got the box down for him. "Thanks Wilt."
"No problem."

Wilt then reached over pulled up a stool at the kitchen table for another friend. "Get your chair for you?"
"Thanks Wilt"

As Wilt made to move along, Bloo and Mac came walking in. "Hey, Wilt!" exclaimed Bloo, "Just the figment I was lookin' for. See, Mac and I were playing with the Whizbee and I said I could throw it higher than Mac, and he said no, I couldn't and I was all like: I so can! And he-"
"Bloo!" Interjected Mac, whose patience was running out.
"I'm gettin' there, keep your shirt on. So I found this big ol' inner tube and I said I could throw it farther with this, and Mac said it wasn't a good idea, but I-"
"You did it anyway?" Wilt supplied.
"I did it anyway! And MAN did that thing fly! It hit the gazeebo, bounced of the big oak tree, ricocheted off'a the extremasaur cage, and landed right on the flagpole on the very top of the house!"
"And you were wondering if I could get it down for you." Said Wilt.
"Couldja? I'd get Mac to, but he's so darn slow, I'd be waiting 'till next August"
"Well, sure!" replied Wilt, "Anything for a friend!"

Just then, with a THUMP! THUMP! another friend entered the kitchen. He was 12 feet tall, orange, with a green and white basketball uniform on. Number zero. And he had a mean scowl on his basketball shaped head. He walked past Wilt and, on the way, accidentally slammed Bloo into the nearby kitchen wall!

"Watch where you're goin', pipsqueak."

There was silence. A frown formed on Wilt's normally smiling face. His one working eye narrowed with anger. "I'm sorry, Larry, but that is not OK!"

All the freinds in the room (and Mac) watched as Larry turned to face Wilt. "You wanna make something of it? Shorty?"

"What if I do?"
"Bring it on, little man."

Just when the two friends seemed on the verge of physical violence, the silence was interrupted by a ka-thump! ka-thump! ka-thump! And a very stern looking Mr Herriman entrered the room. "I say! What is going on here? Master Wilt, Master Larry, break this up immediately! Why, you should be ashamed!"

At this, both friends reluctantly went their seperate ways. "And I should expect better of you both in the future!" Mr Herriman called out after them.
"Man, ever since Foul Larry moved in, he and Wilt have been at each other's throats", noted Mac. "Wow, that would be an AWESOME fight!" Remarked Bloo. "We don't want them to fight, Bloo! We want them to be friends! I hate seeing Wilt so mad." said Mac, sadly. "Well, I'm going to do something about it!" He exclaimed.

"Before or after we get the whizbee down?" asked Bloo.

[antgirl1]

Hahahaha! That was a nice start!

["C" the Dragon]

I like it so far! The characters are in character, especially Bloo!

[emperor26]

You got off to a great start, Ub3rD4n!

[Ub3rD4n]

Well, thanks for the comments, people. My ego can never get enough boosting . As setups tend to be, it was pretty low on the funny, but I'm gonna (hopefullly) make that up starting now. Next chapter time!

Chapter 2: Best laid plans

Later, in Bloo's room, Mac and Bloo were brainstorming ideas to stop the bitter feud between Wilt and Foul Larry.

"Okay, what if we tell them about my Whizbee, forcing them to work together for the greater good?"
"Bloo, we're not trying to get your Whizbee. We're trying to help Wilt and Larry get along. Forget the stupid Whizbee, okay?"
"Well, what if-"
"Forget the Whizbee, Bloo!"
"How'd you know I was gonna say-"
"It's kinda obvious, Bloo. It was the thing that would annoy me most."

Silence, as the two were trying to think up another plan.

"Okay, then, what if we kidnap Madame Foster? Then they'd have to work together to rescue her!" suggested Bloo.
"We're not kidnapping Madame Foster!"
"You're just mad that you didn't think of it first." Said Bloo, sulkily.

More silence, as the two were again deep in thought. Again, Bloo came up with something first. "What if we set something on fire?"
"That wouldn't help at all! And we can't just set things on fire!"
"Then you're not trying hard enough!"
"Ugh, Bloo, if you could think logically for five seconds straight-"
"At least I'm trying! You haven't come up with anything yet!"
"Well, that's because I instantly discard any ideas which are patently dangerous or nonsensical! Anyone could come up with the kinda stuff you've beeen saying!"
"Well, go on then!'
"What?"
"Come up with something, anything!"
"Uhhhh....candyfloss....bees?" Mac blurted out, panicked.

A long period of silence ensued, with Bloo glaring at Mac and Mac looking embarassed.

"Y'know, maybe with some work..." Bloo began. "We're not going to have candyfloss bees!" cried Mac, completely out of patience. "Well, don't shout at me, it was your idea." snapped Bloo.

"Hola, Senor Mac. Hola Senor Azul." Said a large purple monster who had entered the room unnoticed during the argument. "What you doing?"
"Oh hey, Eduardo." replied Mac. Me AND BLOO" he glared at Bloo during this part "were trying to think of a way to stop Wilt and Foul Larry from fighting."
"Ooh, that Foul Larry is so tall and scary." Eduardo remarked. "You think he a good guy inside?"
"Maybe, I dunno." replied Mac."I'd just be happy if those two could meet in a hallway and not get into a fight."

"Hmmmm...." Eduardo mused. "What if.... we have a fiesta! Lots of good food always makes me smile. If we do that, maybe Senor Wilt and Senor Foul Larry realise that they no wanna fight."
"You kiddin' me?" scoffed Bloo,"That's even lamer than candyfloss bees!"
"Of course! If we have a barbecue, it may help those two open up! Thanks Eduardo!" Exclaimed Mac. Bloo crossed his arms and sulked some more. "Oh, no problemo, Senor Mac. Anything to make him less scary." Replied Eduardo modestly.

"I got it!" exclaimed Bloo (yet again). "What if we tell them Eduardo has cancer!"
"Bloo, why would anyone say Eduardo has cancer? That's just dumb."

........."Cancer?" asked Eduardo.

[antgirl1]

Why don't we tell them Eduardo has cancer? LOL

Nicew addition to the story.

["C" the Dragon]

That chapter is also funny! Lol, poor Ed. "Cancer?"

[Ub3rD4n]

Well, thanks for the comments. I advise anyone who reads and enjoys my fic to tell me so, it encourages me to add more chapters quicker.(yeah, fishing for compliments is one of my favourite passtimes). Now, for more fanfic!

Chapter Three: Barbeque

The air sizzled on the hot summers day. It was perfect weather for the barbeque that was going on. Mr Herriman manned (or rabbited) the grill wearing his traditional garb along with an apron with the words "Grill the Chef" on it.

"I say, this barbeque was a capital idea, Master Mac. One does enjoy getting out in the fresh air in this weather." Mr Herriman commented. "Oh, yeah. I get the feeling this is gonna be a great day" replied Mac, who turned to Bloo, who was scarfing down hot dogs and had about five in his arms. "Come on, Bloo, we gotta go." Mac told Bloo, who ate the remaining hot dogs in one gulp and then made to follow Mac, who was walking off to find Wilt. "Now, you remember the plan?" asked Mac. "Like the back of my hand." replied Bloo, confidently. "You don't have hands" Mr Herriman heard Mac say, as the two went out of hearing range. Coco approached and put up a foot with a hot dog bun in it. "Miss Coco," stated Mr Herriman "you cannot expect me to serve you food, knowing you will be holding it with your feet. It's filthy."
"Cocococococo cocococo." replied Coco. "Ah, well, if you put it that way, then yes, by all means" Mr Herriman acqueised, and served her up a dog.

"C'mon Wilt. Bloo, Coco and I are gonna be sitting over here." Mac said, as he dragged Wilt by the arm to a picnic bench. "Okay, mac, whatever you say." replied Wilt. "Okay, I'm gonna go get you something to eat. Stay right there." said Mac, once Wilt was standing around the bench. "Oh, no, you don't have to" said Wilt, making to walk over to the grill himself. "No, no, I INSIST." growled Mac, as he tried to shove Wilt back towards the bench. "Well, okay, thanks, Mac!" Shouted Wilt, as Mac ran off.

"-And only the cooooolest imaginary friends get to sit on THIS bench. That's why I'm gonna be there." assured Bloo of Foul Larry, who he was dragging to the same picnic table as Wilt. "Nowstayrightthereanddon'tmove!" He blurted out once Larry had made it, while he ran off to join Mac and Eduardo.

"Okay, the sour ball is in the pinata, repeat, the sour ball is in the piniata." Bloo stated as soon as he reached Mac and Ed. "Bloo, I'm right here, and we aren't using code." Mac said in response. "You ready, Ed?"
"You sure I no get cancer?"
"No, that was just a dumb rumour, now go! Before they get into a fight!"

...............
"Hey."
"Hi."
"Soooo.....you seen the game last night?"
"Yeah, that ref was way out of line. That weren't no trippin'."
"Oh, you WOULD say that, you big cheater!"
"Oh, yeah, well, at least I win games!"
"Well at least I have freinds!"
"At least I have two arms!"
"I'm sorry, you did NOT just go there!"
At this point, Eduardo interposed himself between the two arguing friends (having just arrived on the scene) and put his hands in the air. "Hold up, hooold up. Now everybody just calm down. Now I see you is mad at each other, but you know what might help? If we talk about our feeeelings. Okay, you first, Senor Wilt."
"Well, okay." said Wilt, stunned, and obviously not used to being asked how he feels. "I was just saying how Larry here is a jerk, and a cheater, and that makes me feel mad."
"Okay, now Senor Larry, how you feel?"
"Well, I was just trying to have a polite conversation, and then he goes and brings up all this stuff from the past. Why you gotta be bringin' up old stuff?"
"I'm sorry, but you permanantly broke my arm and eye! I had to have the arm amputated! And THEN you teased me about it!"
"Well, if you weren't such a baby about it-"
"Well, if you weren't such a jacka-"
"Now, now, Wilt, you get your turn." Eduardo vainly tried to control the situation, but it was getting too far out of hand.
"Cheater!"
"Wuss!"
"Kid crusher!"
"Rabbit beater!"
"You know WHAT?!" Wilt erupted "forget this. I'm just gonna go and have a nice barbeque with my FRIENDS. Come on, Eduardo." . And he stomped off, Eduardo trailing sadly behind.

Mac and Bloo, who were watching from afar, turned to face each other. "So, you think it worked? I can't lip read." Bloo asked. "No, Bloo, it went horribly." Mac answered, and lay down dejectedly on the grass. "Man, if this doesn't work, then what will?" The two sat there for a moment.
"Well, duh!" Exclaimed Bloo. "We live in a house with HUNDREDS of creatures who were DESIGNED to be friendly! One of them's bound to know how to make those two friends!"

Cut to Duchess's room, with Duchess's head sticking out the door, and Mac and Bloo standing out front. "Go away." Duchess snorted, and slammed the door in their faces. "Okay, that first one doesn't count." noted Bloo.

[antgirl1]

Oooooooh! Wilt nearly SWORE! XDD

Nice one. Can't wait for the next chapter.

["C" the Dragon]

That's an intresting chapter. For some strange reason, I find Wilt and Larry's argument quite intresting. And Bloo's a classic, as usual.