Bloogio: King of Fosters (Not a crossover!)

[Ub3rD4n]

I have been silent for too long! About 4 or 5 days. But for me, that's too long. And I know of at least 2 people who are looking forward to seeing more of my fanfic. So, first off, this fanfic is not a crossover, nor does it have anything to do with cards. The title IS relevant, and despite the confusion I knew it would engender, it was just too awesome in my opinion to pass up. You'll find out how it's relevant pretty soon. I also thought, after my last fic which updated around a chapter per day, that I needed to think my ideas out a tad more before posting them here. So I did, and this is what you get:

Title shot: Episode title on a gold and silver plaque, on blue background

Chapter 1: A Herri Problem

Mr Herriman bounced up the hall to his office, fresh from breakfast, and humming. He opened the door, entered the room, and paused before his desk. "Ah, a new day full of possibilities. Perhaps I shall be able to complete the tax returns today." he claimed contentedly, and hopped over to his desk, sat behind it, and began to arrange papers. When he had the relevant documents on his desk to his satisfaction, he pulled out a quill pen and made to write. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK! came a sudden rapping at his office door.
"Come in." instructed Mr Herriman, slightly irritated. In bustled Duchess, followed closely by Bloo, carrying a paddleball.
"Herriman!" yelled Duchess "That tiny blue moron is making a nuisance of himself! How can I get my beauty sleep with that incessant paddle-swinging noise! I ask of you!"
"I was playing paddleball three rooms down from you!"
"Well, you were making enough noise for a herd of elephants!"
"I'll paddleball where I please!"
"Miss Duchess! Master Blooreguard! Be quiet, the both of you! Now, it is apparent that, in the interest of avoiding conflict, Master Blooreguard can play his paddleball elsewhere." Mr Herriman stated.
"But, Mr Herriman-"
"My decision is final. Now if you two would be so kind, I have work to do."
With Duchess smirking and Bloo looking sour, the two left the room, closing the door behind them.
"Now, where was I?"
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!
"Enter."
In came Smarty Pants (an OC from a previous fanfic. Look, he's not really that important) with a petulant look on his face.
"Mr Herriman, the state of this house's library is appalling. Now ASIDE from the troubling lack of a decent fantasy and science fiction section, the orginisation is atrocious. I-"
"Could you get to the point, Master Smarty Pants?"
"Well, it's all here in this 50 page proposal I wrote out." he dumped a large wad of papers on Mr Herriman's desk. "I'm sure that, after reading this, you will agree that-"
"Yes, yes yes." Mr Herriman muttered as he forced Smarty Pants to the door. "Very good. Uplifting to see a freind with such dedication to the house, etcetera, etcetera, now, if you'll excuse me..." at which point he shoved Smarty Pants out the door and slammed it shut behind him.

Unfortunately, Mr Heriman had no sooner reached his desk again when he was interrupted. This annoying trend persisted long into the day.

"Sissors poked me!"
"No, I didn't!"

"Foul Larry is being mean!"

"Stripy freind smash Red flowers!"

"And so, I really need a step-ladder for the bathroom-"
"Enough!" Mr Herriman screamed at Crackers. He then hopped over to the intercom, and yelled through it "Attention all residents! Mandatory House meeting in the play room in five minutes! An important announcement!"

....................

The play room was not really a room for playing in. It was, rather, a room with a large stage, and enough room for hundreds in the audience, so long as the audience didn't mind standing. (Seen in, for example, Berry Scary. The place where the giant rubber-band ball was revealed.) All the friends of the house gathered to hear this "important announcement" Mr Herriman spoke of. The crowd was fairly thick, and although all the Fosters Five were there, only Wilt could see the stage. (Incidentally, Slugger was bouncing up and down in an attempt to see. Who's Slugger? Another unimportant OC of mine from a previous fanfic)
"Oh, I'm sorry." Said Wilt to Mac, bending down. "Wanna lift?" Mac climbed onto Wilt's shoulders and Wilt stood up again to full height, so that they both had a good view as Mr Herriman hopped across the stage up to the podium.
"Order! Settle down, people!" he ordered through the microphone. Once the dull buzz of conversation (and actual buzzing of imaginary bees) died down, he continued. "Fellow house residents. It has recently come to my attention that the house population, at current, is too large for me to adequately fulfil my role of House President alone. In order for me to be able to manage the finances of this house, I must seek a representative to take care of mundane house disputes and desicions in my stead. Therefore, I am instating the official position of King of Fosters." This led to much murmuring among the crowd. "Whoever takes on this grave responsibility shall be subordinate to the House President, and shall be charged with maintaining order in the house so that the President is free to occupy himself with higher affairs. All residents of the house shall have to obey the decrees of the King, or be subject to the most abominable punishment known to Fosters."
"Expulsion?"
"Mucking out the unicorn stables?"
"Feeding the Extremasaurs?"
"No." said Mr Herriman gravely "A fate far worse. They will be responsible for keeping out and cleaning up after....Master Cheese." he then lifted a leg to reveal Cheese hugging it, saying "Preeeetty mousey."
"Who gets to be king?" cried Bloo "I got dibs!"
"The position of King of Fosters shall be decided by popular vote. Only imaginary friends need apply. The elections shall be in two days time. Nominations should be submitted to my office before that time. That is all."
"Well, Wilt's got my vote!" called out an anonymous imaginary friend.
"Me too!" it was seconded.
This was met with general agreement among the friends gathered. Wilt looked modest. "Me? I'm sure someone else deserves the position way more than-"
"Cococococo!"
"You really mean that?"
"Of course we mean that! You would make a muy bueno King, Wilt!"
"Well, you can't be King, cause I'm gonna be King!" announced Bloo.
"Okay, Bloo. I'm sure the best freind will be the one the house votes for." replied Wilt, as he, Coco and Eduardo, walked off to Mr Herriman's office.
"I beleive you can be King, Bloo!" Mac stated. "How about I be your campaign manager? When you get in, I can help you with your job."
"Help me how?"
"You know, solve disputes, make the decisions..."
"Then what'll I do?"
"You'll take the glory."
"Sweet! That's a great idea, Mac! Together, noone can stop us! We'll squash Wilt like a bug!......Uh, no offence, Joey."
"*sigh*..........none taken." said a large, gross, insectoid friend behind them.

[Vampyre]

Hey, that's pretty cool! You're doing a great job so far, and the plot is really clever but...

I don't think Mac, even though Bloo IS his best friend, would help Bloo over Wilt. King of Fosters sounds like a pretty big title, so I would have thought that Mac would think, being the more responisible and wiser candidate of the two, it'd be best if Wilt won. But hey, it's just my opinion.

I can't wait to see the rest of the story!

[antgirl1]

Oh yeah, they automatically pick Wilt...Why am I not surprised? XD

Good story so far! Love to see more!

[Ub3rD4n]

Whoo, that was a little longer break between chapters than I thought! So, yeah, who WOULDN'T want Wilt as their King. Pandering to his legions of fangirls aside, I know I would! In response to Vampyre's comment, I think that Mac would support Bloo, even if he knew that Bloo wasn't strictly speaking the best for the job, if he didn't consider it to be much of a big deal. It's not that he doesn't think Wilt would be better, it's just personal loyalties. And of course, your opinion is a highly valid one, but the way I made it turn out is almost as valid, and I thought it would be better for the story. Speaking of which:

Chapter 2: Bloo/Mac 2007

Mac and Bloo came walking down the hall. Mac had a bucket in his hand full of rolled up posters and Bloo had a roll of sticky tape. Mac put the bucket down, pulled out a poster, unrolled it, and put it up against the wall. The poster had a picture of Bloo on it, in Uncle Sam outfit, and pointing angrily at the observer. The text read simply: Bloo/Mac 2007. Bloo then proceeded to tape the poster to the wall. Frankie, who had come wandering by, stopped to chat with them. "Going for the whole "King of Fosters" thing, huh, Bloo? This is just like the time I ran for House President."
"Yeah, actually, we're trying to avoid comparisons to that."
Meanwhile, upstairs, Coco, Wilt and Eduardo were working on their campaign. Coco layed an egg, and kicked it off the stairs, so that it hit the celing and cracked open. Thousands of "Vote for Wilt" fliers rained down on the foyer, which was full of friends.
"Hey, no fair!" yelled Bloo.
"Don't worry, Bloo. I've got an idea that's waaay better than fliers." replied Mac.

"Vote for Bloo! Free peppermint brownies! Vote for Bloo!" Mac called, as Bloo handed out said peppermint brownies to the general population of the house. He handed one to The New Guy. "There you go, my fine.....uh, whatever you're supposed to be. Vote for Bloo!"
"Hey, Bloo." said Smarty Pants "I appreciate free brownies, but if I vote for you, what're your policies?"
"What're my policies?" Bloo retorted, exaggeratedly, "You think I don't know my own policies? I will let you know, sir, that I know my policies." Mac then surreptitiously handed his some peices of card. "They're all here on these cards." Bloo finished smugly, brandishing the cards. Mac hit his own head in embarrasment.
"Lesse here...my policies are to restock the library, fix the leaky plumbing on the fifth floor....charity work...hey! All these policies suck!" Bloo lept up on an ornamental coffee table. "If I am elected, chores will be a thing of the past! A jetcar in every bedroom, and the whole house will be clothes optional!" This was met with cheers, except for Mac, who reminded Bloo "The house already IS clothes optional!"
"Then why are you still wearing THAT? I mean, seriously, who dresses you, your mom?"
"Hey, look!" someone yelled, pointing at Wilt, Eduardo and Coco, who had a table with a gigantic, multi-tiered chocolate cake. Everyone rushed over to them.
"Oh, so it's war, huh?" growled Bloo "Well, I have not yet begun to campagan!"
"That's campaign." cut in Smarty Pants
"Shut up, you!"

"Come on, Madame Foster! Shake my hand!"
"Oh, no ya don't! I ain't falling for that again! Fool me once, shame on Bloo, fool me twice, shame on City Hall!" Madame Foster said defiantly, walking briskly away from Bloo, who dived to the floor and grabbed her legs.
"But I gotta shake hands with old people, and Frankie already said no!"
"Not gonna happen, bub!" she yelled, freeing herself from Bloo's grasp, and walking off.
"Okay, Mac, I didn't want to do this, but he's forced my hand."

"Mmmmmwah!" Bloo kissed Big Baby, right on the cheek, who then dissolved into bawling. "Oh, come on! it was just a kiss! Don't be such a....well..." he then got a smack in the head from Coco, who was there with Wilt and Eduardo.
"Cococo!"
"What? I was not harassing him! Er, her...it."
"You can give me a kiss if you want, Bloo." said Eduardo.
"Eduardo, my man! Can I rely on your vote?" Bloo asked, pinning a "Bloo 2007" button onto Eduardo, eliciting a yelp.
"But....I thought that Senor Wilt would be a better King."
"Come on, Eduardo! If I'm elected King, we can have round the clock exterminators! Think of it! You'd never have to see a slimy, disgusitng bug again in your life!......No offence Joey."
"Once again......none taken." said Joey despondently.
"Waaagh! Insecto!" cried Eduardo, who ran off in terror.
"Why do they always scream?" asked Joey.

Screeeeeeech! Went the microphone in the play room, as Mr Herriman adjusted it. "Ahem. As you all know, today is the day of the elections for King of Fosters. I suggest you choose wisely, for the person you choose will have a great deal of power over you. I only hope that you make the right choice and choose someone responsible for the job. All nominees have the opportunity to make a short speech before the polls are opened. Master Wilt?"
Wilt tried to adjust his microphone so that he could speak while standing, but settled for just adjusting it as high as it could go, and bending down a little.
"Uhhhh....hi! I'm Wilt! Uh....I guess you already know that....Well...I think I should be King of Fosters because the psoition's all about helping people. And I love helping people. I know each and every one of you by name, and I know you're all great people. Even those of you who are...not so great."
"Get on with it!" shouted Duchess.
"Sorry. Well, yeah. I think I'd make a great King for Fosters. I'd do my best to live up to the responsibility, and help make Fosters the best place for imaginary friends! So vote for me! ......uh, if that's okay."

The friends then turned their attention to Little Lincon, who was sitting in Moose's pocket, with the mic adjusted to his level. "My fellow Imaginary Friends! I know I may have done you wrong in the past, but if elected, I assure you I will not enslave the lot of you for my own personal gain-" at this point there was a lot of booing coming at him form the audience, and a tomato was thrown at him. "Get us outta here you moron!" he yelled at Moose, who then retreated backstage.

So it was Bloo's turn to speak. "Friends! I think it's pretty obvious to you who you should vote for here! Me! Cause I am the awesomest candidate here! If you vote for me, I promise non-stop partying! All hours access to the kitchen! And a thousand elephants!" this was met with much cheering.
"Now," remarked Mr Herriman, "If all the candidates have said their peice-"
"Ahem!" shouted Slugger "I haven't said MY peice yet!"
"........Must you?"
"Yes!.....My friends" he began lightly "Unlike my fellow candidates, I cannot make you crazy promises like "Awesome" or "Justice" or "Not enslaving you all", but I CAN promise you that I will be me. And I am more important than anything. So vote for me! It's me!"
"Well, if you're quite done," Mr Herriman said snarkily "let the voting begin!"

A convinent amount of time later...
"The votes have been tabulated!" Frankie announced. "The votes stand thus: As the grand loser, with only one vote, Slugger!"
"What!? I was robbed!"
"The next lowest was Little Lincon, with two votes! Next came Bloo, with three votes! After that was Zigzag, with twenty votes-"
"Zigzag!" cried Bloo in disbelief, "Who the heck is Zigzag?"
"And, well......all the rest of the votes go to Wilt. Congradulations, Wilt!"
"Oh yeah!" cried Wilt, jumping into the air with glee. He then seemed to regain his composure. "Sorry."

[antgirl1]

Originally Posted by Ub3rD4n

After that was Zigzag, with twenty votes-"
"Zigzag!" cried Bloo in disbelief, "Who the heck is Zigzag?"

LOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!

Another great chapter, dude! XDD

[Vampyre]

Originally Posted by Ub3rD4n

Whoo, that was a little longer break between chapters than I thought! So, yeah, who WOULDN'T want Wilt as their King. Pandering to his legions of fangirls aside, I know I would! In response to Vampyre's comment, I think that Mac would support Bloo, even if he knew that Bloo wasn't strictly speaking the best for the job, if he didn't consider it to be much of a big deal. It's not that he doesn't think Wilt would be better, it's just personal loyalties. And of course, your opinion is a highly valid one, but the way I made it turn out is almost as valid, and I thought it would be better for the story.

Yeah, you're right, sorry about that. I mean, Mac probably WOULD help Bloo, out of loyalty, after all, they ARE best friends. Sorry, again.

Originally Posted by Ub3rD4n

"After that was Zigzag, with twenty votes-"
"Zigzag!" cried Bloo in disbelief, "Who the heck is Zigzag?"

*drops her cookie*

... Was that a coincidence, or did my OC just make a technical cameo?

Heh heh, awesome chapter! I can't wait for an update!

[FailedShapeshifter]

Hehehehe.....campagan......Awesome chapter I can't wait for the next one!

Oh, and yay for Vampyre and Zigzag's popularity!

[jekylljuice]

Bravo! Quite possibly your finest fanfic yet! Keep it up!

[Ub3rD4n]

Excuse me for taking a small compliment waaay too seriously, buuuuuuuttt:

My best fanfic ever? That's awesome! I thought I was taking a real risk on this one, since it relys much less on gag-based humour and more on character-based humour than the others (much like Fosters itself). I'm glad now that I found it too awesome not to write, despite the lack of gags. Yeah, I'm glad people are liking it.

Chapter 4: Up For Grabs

Mac, Wilt and Bloo stormed up to the new "throne room", with Bloo muttering angrily all the way. "What a waste of power! I should be King!"
When the three got to the doorway to the throne room, they saw Coco sitting behind a desk.
"Hey, Coco!" called Wilt.
"Coco cococococo?"
"We're here to talk to King Eduardo about some of his policies." said Mac, gravely.
"Coco. Coco cocococo cococo."
"Like bull he's in a meeting!" shouted Bloo, as he and Mac made to march right on throught the doors. Coco jumped out from behind her desk and stood in their way. "Cococo coco!" She shouted.
"Okay then, you leave us no choice!" cried Bloo. He then ran straight through her legs, Mac following behind him. Coco made to chase after them, but Wilt wrapped his arm around her waist and restrained her. "Sorry, Coco!"

When Mac and Bloo walked into the throne room, they saw it completely empty, aside from Eduardo napping in his throne with his crown on.
"Hey! Eduardo! Wake up!" yelled Bloo.
"Hm? Huh? Aah! Oh. Hola Senor Mac, Hola Senor Bloo. How you get past Coco?"
"That's not important. We need to talk to you about some of your new policies. They're kinda.....dumb." replied Mac.
"They is not dumb! They is what's best for Fosters!"
"Tea parties, Eduardo? TEA PARTIES?" shouted Bloo.
"You is just jealous! You want to be King!"
"That is so totally not true! And even if it was, it wouldn't be the whole reason for this!"
"Coco! You can see these gentlemen out now!"
"That's it! There's more than one way to change things!" yelled Bloo. "Whoever holds the crown has the power and responsibility. Whoever has the crown! That means if I get the crown, I get to be King!"
"You wouldn't!" cried Eduardo. Mac and Bloo moved threateningly towards him.
"Just hand over the crown, Ed. Noone has to get hurt." Bloo said sooothingly. Eduardo looked timidly to Mac, then to Bloo, then lowered his head and charged them both! He continued to charge right out the door, screaming. Mac and Bloo quickly recovered their wits and chased after him.
"Uh, are you sure we should be-" Wilt began, as he saw them run past, as he was having his head pecked by Coco.
"Whoever gets the crown gets to be kiiiing!" screeched Bloo, as he was still chasing. With this, Coco and several other friends who were having involuntary tea-parties nearby also took up chase.

Crackers was walking down a hall, making to grab himself a drink of water downstairs. He then heard a BAM! BAM! BAM! sound coming down the hall, and Eduardo ran past and knocked him over. He slowly got himself back up, and was overrun by a whole horde of imaginary friends! He then treid to get up again, but was jumped on by Slugger, bringing up the rear. Eduardo ran like the dickens, but eventually found himself up against a dead end. He turned around, shaking, and prepared to charge the lot of them, when Wilt reached up and grabbed the crown from off of his head. He then realised what that meant, screamed, and threw the crown away. It went over the heads of the friends gathered, Slugger jumped up to catch it but fumbled it again and again, until it flew away from him and bounced around on the floor, landing at a friend's feet. The friend picked it up with a claw-like hand, and placed the crown on her head. "Whoever gets the crown gets the title, no? Then say hello to your new Queen." stated Duchess.

The friends were stunned for quite some time. Finally, Duchess broke the silence by shouting "You! You!" pointing to two large burly friends, "You are now my personal guards. You are not to allow anyone within ten feet of my personage without my express permission." The two friends snapped to it, taking up positions in front of and to either side of Duchess. "As for the rest of you mongrels, as my first act as Queen, I denounce these ridiculous garments!" she threw down her safety gear disdainfully. The crowd cheered.
"Secondly, I demand a tribute worthy of my beauty! I require a thirty-foot stone statue of myself constructed on the grounds! It shall stand as a testament to my power!"
"I'm sorry, but...where are we supposed to find that much stone?" asked Wilt.
"What do you think this wretched house is built on? Dig it up! Now quit lazing around! Go! Go! Go!"
"Hey, you can't treat your subjects that way!" interjected Mac.
"Ah, yes...the filthy urchin. As for you.....you are banned from this house! Forever! You! Ugly!" Duchess demanded, pointing at Eduardo, "Show him the door!"

Slam! The main Fosters doors were slammed open. Eduardo, holding Mac, threw him out, gently.
"Eduardo, you can't do this! You can't take orders from that witch!"
"I is sorry, Mac." said Eduardo, with tears in his eyes, as he shut the doors.

"Enter." called Duchess. Little Lincon entered her room, slowly, as he had no legs, and didn't have Moose around to carry him. He was hit immediately by the overpowering odor of bad perfume, as he crawled to Duchess, who was sitting on her plush bed, surrounded by cushions. "Well, it's about time." Duchess remarked, when he finally got into view. "You have the status report on my statue?"
"Yes, your highness. The friends are working overtime and your statue should be done in three weeks."
"Three weeks! Unacceptable! This laziness shall not be tolerated!"
"But, your majesty, with all due respect, they're workin' as hard as they can!"
"Nonsense! You must not be whipping them enough! Now get back out there and do your job!"
".......Yes, your highness. Thank you." Little Lincon proceeded to drag himself out of Duchess's room. Just then, Frankie burst in, shouting.
"Of all the rotten, no good things you've done, Duchess, this one takes the cake! You're turning this house into a slave labour camp! You're completely taking advantage of the other friends! If you had any respect at all for human decency- but you don't do you? What do you have to say for yourself?"
"Guards, take Miss Frances here to the dungeon."
"Dungeon?" one asked.
"The foyer bathroom. And lock her in there!" Frankie's screams were muffled as he took her away.
"I grow bored. Call out my jester!" Duchess yelled. Bloo came walking into the room, in full jesters regalia.
"Hey there, Queeny! Bored? Well jester Bloo'll make you laugh 'till your pants are full!"
"Enough stalling! Get to the funny!"
"So, how do you upset a toolbox? You make it SAW!" Bloo began to laugh at his own joke, but Duchess simply scowled at him.
"How do you tell if there's an elephant in your soup? ORANGE you glad to see me? Huh? Huh?" Duchess remained unamused.
"Okay, time to bring out the big guns." Bloo remarked. He then pulled out a pie and threw it at his own face. "Ta da!"
"...............You displease me. Send him to the mines."
"What? No! Not the mines! Nooooo!!!" Bloo screamed, as Duchess's bodyguards grabbed him and dragged him off.

The mine was dark, dank, and full of dust clouds. Wilt, Eduardo and Coco were already mining when Bloo was chucked down there with a shovel.
"Man, this stinks! I gotta work my nonexistent fingers to the nonexistent bone mining all day!" he announced.
"It could be worse, Bloo. You could be on statue duty." mentioned Wilt.

Cut to Smarty Pants outside, struggling to move a giant stone cube several times his weight, with Bendy on top of it, whipping him.

"Well, all I'm saying is.....it's all Ed's fault!"
"What? It all your fault for chasing me!"
"But you could have just handed over the crown to me and then we wouldn't be in this mess!"
Big pause..............
"Why are you all staring at me like that?"
Another bucket-load of stone got hauled up to the surface, and another empty bucket went back down. And out of it popped Mac!
"Mac!" the friends cried (Except Coco. Coco said "Coco!". But I guess you already figured that).
"Me thought you was banned!" exclaimed Eduardo.
"Yeah, but Duchess only has power over the IMAGINARY FRIENDS in this house! Not me!"
"Well, you better get going, Mac! Sorry, but if you get found out, we'll get into lots of trouble!" Wilt mentioned.
"Oh, I'm not going anywhere but Duchess's room. I got a plan to get her out of office."
"All right!" exclaimed Wilt "But can we do it on our five minute lunch break?"

[antgirl1]

Not Duchess! And I thought Eduardo was out of line. XDDDD