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-   -   Your Thoughts on Romance (http://www.fosters-home.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2900)

Howard 01-29-2008 11:16 AM

There are days where I want to say "be careful what you wish for." I was single for the longest time, until Katie entered my life. There are days where I wish there was noone else in my life but family and friends. Do not get me wrong, we love eachother and our dog, but we hardly see eachother because of our jobs and her schooling on top of that. When we do see achother, the long hours have taken their toll (especially for her, because of school on top of job), and we are tired and irritable with one another. Then the dog pisses both of us off when he does his normal "doggie" things. That is where I wish I was still single. I would still be living in my old house if that was the case.

Am I saying romance is for the birds? Absolutely not! But you have to make room for that other person in your life, and that is a great challenge at times; it can be very rewarding though.:frankiesmile:

Mr. Marshmallow 01-29-2008 05:29 PM

As most of you guys who have read my posts on the cartoon attraction thread know, I am a firm believer in romance and I have been prone to sappy, emotional, and at times corny statements about the power of life and stuff like that. Having said that, I want to be up front when I say i totally believe it.

I do not believe love is as romantically fairy tale orientated as movies and TV paint it, which I understand and know full well. However, I believe there is in fact a person designated to all of us somewhere in this world. Just because you cannot find that person does not mean that person does not exist somewhere.

Love is a hard thing and it doesn't come easy, but I believe love is such a wonderful feeling that is worth the hardships. Nothing good in this life comes easy, nothing. I believe we were not put on this planet to be alone and even if some of us do not find our true love, I still believe that lover is still out there.

I believe in love because in truth, if you don't then how can you explain the love you feel for pets, family, friends? Romance is simply a different variation of that kind of love and if you can love a comic book, a TV show, a dog, or even a car, why can't you find that same passion and love in another human?

I don't believe the whole romance is chemicals jargin, I think that's crap to be blunt because its a sterile way to describe our emotions. Pain, crying, laughter, any one of those emotions can be boiled down into a cold, lifeless scientific explanation through chemicals, neural impulses and stuff like that.

If you look at romance through that you may as well look at everything else in a sterile manner as well. I believe that not only does love exist but that it is existing for each and everyone of us, and belief or lack of belief does not nullify that awaiting feeling. People assume belief is required for everything.

If ghosts exist for example, whether you believe ghosts don't exist is irrelevant. I think love is something that is very real and while very hard to find, it is something that i think we all have the capacity to do and to find. Its hard, its painful, and it can be a very lonely, long, and depressing journey, but I believe that it is real and having that in my own heart is enough to make me withstand any amount of loneliness.

Nathander 01-29-2008 07:22 PM

First, thank you, everyone, for telling me your beliefs on the matter.

For the life of me, I've been trying to find some way to argue my point, but except for one fact about it, I really can't. In all honesty, your perceptions are probably better than mine; I gladly accept this. I really can't find a way to combat them, because in the way you all put your beliefs, I feel they're probably right, or at least for you, they are.

Again, because of my own experiences with the matter, it's simply easier for me to feel like romantic love is meaningless and non-existent, or at least for me. I basically acknowledge that it's something that can never happen to me again, and that's just the way it is, and like jekylljuice said, finding love isn't the only way to find fulfillment in life. You have your way, I have mine; whether either way is genuinely correct, no one can really know.

As for the moment I take issue with....

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Marshmallow (Post 70503)
I don't believe the whole romance is chemicals jargin, I think that's crap to be blunt because its a sterile way to describe our emotions. Pain, crying, laughter, any one of those emotions can be boiled down into a cold, lifeless scientific explanation through chemicals, neural impulses and stuff like that.

If you look at romance through that you may as well look at everything else in a sterile manner as well.

The thing is, we know by scientific fact that they ARE just chemicals. To say they aren't is to basically defy fairly well established scientific fact. And, in all honesty, science is one of the three main pillars I found my life around. I honestly don't see what problem there is with taking a scientific and logical viewpoint of life.

Mr. Marshmallow 01-29-2008 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nathander (Post 70525)
The thing is, we know by scientific fact that they ARE just chemicals. To say they aren't is to basically defy fairly well established scientific fact. And, in all honesty, science is one of the three main pillars I found my life around. I honestly don't see what problem there is with taking a scientific and logical viewpoint of life.

Because science essentially turns any kind of emotion, event, or experience into something that is sterile, lifeless, and cold. There is nothing wrong with taking a logical look at love, I'm just saying to me its redundant to look at something that is not really logical, logically.

Nathander 01-29-2008 08:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Marshmallow (Post 70536)
Because science essentially turns any kind of emotion, event, or experience into something that is sterile, lifeless, and cold. There is nothing wrong with taking a logical look at love, I'm just saying to me its redundant to look at something that is not really logical, logically.

As long as I don't harm another person in thinking that way, I'm uncertain why that's wrong. I find it logical to look at love this way due to the fact that I see no purpose or truth in romantic love, but then again, that's simply my own personal opinion. I don't believe my opinion necessarily to be fact, but I do find it as a logical way to live my life.

Cassini90125 01-29-2008 08:38 PM

The chemical basis for love and every other emotion is established scientific fact and as such it's existance really isn't open to debate. This does not, however, diminish the experience of love in any way, and for me there is truly no more wonderful feeling in all the world. :frankiesmile:

Mr. Marshmallow 01-29-2008 08:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cassini90125 (Post 70548)
The chemical basis for love and every other emotion is established scientific fact and as such it's existance really isn't open to debate. This does not, however, diminish the experience of love in any way, and for me there is truly no more wonderful feeling in all the world. :frankiesmile:

That was my point more or less, not that it didn't exist but the fact it was a cold and sterile way to describe something that beautiful of a feeling.

jekylljuice 01-30-2008 04:52 AM

I think an important thing to keep in mind is that being in love doesn't have to be restricted to having feelings for someone else around you on a romantic level. Being in love, to me, is the intoxicating sensation when certain stimuli triggers a particularly buoyant response within my brain, and as such I'm filled with the overwhelming desire to think about that particular stimuli all the time. And it is indeed a wonderful feeling. I'm tempted to think that it pertains more to a simple hedonistic desire to experience pleasure, as opposed to any instinctual desire for procreation. Remember that there's absolutely nothing wrong with a bit of hedonism.

The stimuli in question can be other people in one's life, but it doesn't have to be. You can be in love with art, nature, or even something purely hypothetical like a meme or an idea. That's the kind of love I feel all the time.


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